Best of RSB - January 1998
The "Best of RSB" Committee
Each month a distinguished Committee of one unnamed rsber presents the official "Best of rsb." This
monthly highlight is in recognition of those very special posts that simply stand out from the crowd. The guidelines
are far too complex to go into, but suffice it to say that originality, content, humor, and - most importantly
- the whim of the Committee play a large role in the selections. As always, the Committee's decisions are final,
and intentional groveling will be looked upon with much disdain.
On to the awards for January....Another bad month for flame wars we're afraid to report. Fortunately, the Committee
is persistent and untiring, and was able to uncover quite a number of excellent entries in amongst the noise.
(We do this for *you*, dear readers.) So excellent, in fact, that we have two winners this month. Though the
Committee is careful about exposing its sentimental side, both winners presented heartwarming stories that simply
couldn't be passed up. If you weren't touched, you're not human. First, Tom Bellhouse's Bedtime Tale:
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Subject: Bedtime Story
From: Tom Bellhouse
Date: 1998/01/13
OK, I've gotta share this story.
My boy (10 years old) and I were both playing in a small Scotch Doubles 9-ball tournament last Sunday, but not as partners. The tournament organizer had grouped the 8 best players and the 8 lowest, and we drew for partners. I have to mention that all the participants (except for my son) were in the 20-to-60 age range.
My boy drew one of the better players. Play proceeded, but about half-way through his second match I noticed that play had stopped at his table (I was a couple of tables away.) My boy came over to me and said, "Here, Dad, hold onto this for me." It was a baby tooth! We got some ice for his mouth, and he went right back to his match -- which he won with a fine, long shot on the 9 in a hill-hill situation.
We both had a ball, we both won some matches (but no prizes), and Sunday night the tooth fairy left him a little cash under his pillow.
The thing about this kid is, he doesn't know when he's supposed to miss, so he makes incredible shots. He's beating me now getting the 7-8-9, and we're gonna have to renegotiate soon!
I have to go practice now. If I don't, he'll be making mincemeat of me by the time all the baby teeth are gone. ;<)
This is a great sport, isn't it?
Best regards, and goodnight, from Tom Bellhouse (and his son Wyn)
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Did we catch you snifflin'? The second winner is Toby Vaughn with the story of his initial league experience.
Toby's noble cause is to rally beginner players into league competition, and the Committee certainly concurs.
The story is excerpted here, but if you missed it the first time, we recommend you pick up the whole piece from
DejaNews or
AltaVista. Just to make sure, we've left off the ending...
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Subject: My first league game (long story)
From: Toby Vaughn
Date: 1998/01/13
This anecdote is primarily directed toward you newbies out there, but maybe it will ring a familiar chord with you old timers as well....
When he called, last week it was, we talked a little bit about the league. As it turns out, they were playing that night, and he invited me down to watch the action so I could get a better feel for what league play was all about....
...As I spoke to the captain, it began to dawn on me that he was looking for a substitute _this_ week, that is, right now! ...
Breaking?! Couldn't I warm my hands around the rack for the first game? I guess not. So I hurriedly screwed my cue together and walked around to the head of the table. There was only one problem, I made my way so hurriedly that I completely forgot to chalk my tip. I took careful aim, reared back, and promptly miscued the ball, launching it high into the air, over the rack, over the foot rail, and narrowly missing one of my teammates on the fly! ...
So to all you lurkers out there who love the game but are afraid that you're just not good enough to play in a league (and you know who you are), all I can say is, "Get out there and play!" You may win your first game, or you may lose it, but nobody will care. You will have a great time, and, either way, you will be a winner for following your passion.
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Runner-up honors must go to the shy person known as "Trubbelsum" for the story of John Higgins (didn't
he just get knocked out of the B&H Masters by Tony Hamilton?). Anyway, this is a wonderful story about young
John and about making it on the Snooker tour. Excerpted here, again, due to length:
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Subject: Another Snooker Story
From: Trubbelsum
Date: 1998/01/21
THE KID: The Hurricane hit first, then The Whirlwind blew through, bringing The Grinder, The Golden Nugget and The Great One (aka Alex Higgins, Jimmy White, Cliff Thorburn, Steve Davis and Stephen Hendry) in its wake. Now comes The Kid, John Higgins....
He is ranked No 2 in the world but many are those - wise in the way of screw, side and stun - who believe he is the best around. In fact, The Kid might just have become The Champ but for . . .
THE MISS: Leading Ronnie O'Sullivan 12-11 in their best-of-25 Embassy World Championship quarter-final and with the last three colours sitting temptingly on their spots, The Kid chalks his cue for the umpteenth time as the Crucible falls silent once more. He leans over the table, lines up the object ball in his sights, then . . .
"Ninety-nine times out of 100 I'd have cleared up the colours easy. But it's the Crucible, I'm almost in the semis, and the tension is sheer agony. The adrenalin is surging and I just hit the blue a bit too hard. It goes in all right and I'm thinking 'you've won' but the cue ball comes round the angles and just rolls on a couple of inches too far for the pink." ...
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And a few "posts of note." In this entry, Rodney K. Bone (surely the hands- down winner for Best RSB
Name) goes off on a bit of a rant about organizing leagues. Make no mistake, there's a lot of excellent observations
in this piece - recommended reading for league operators and room owners, we humbly submit. Excerpts:
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Subject: Billiards - Popularity Problems
From: Rodney K. Bone
Date: 1998/01/06
We have several problems with organizing leagues and events not just participation.
1) Room owners do not want to help with the work or promotion. They want us to bring them players. ...
4) Room owners refuse to work together to create multi-house leagues. We even have problems getting inter-house challenge matches together. ("If we don't play at our room we don't want to play") ...
7) Most people think that there are no expenses involved in promoting the events and get very upset to find out that $5 of their entry fee goes to operating expense, table time, etc. ...
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The Committee doesn't remember reading from Vijay before, but we're glad he put fingers to keyboard to come up
with this little ditty:
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Subject: Ode to Squirt
From: Vijay Venugopal
Date: 1998/01/19
From the madness that I call a mind:
There once was an effect called squirt
That made people think so much it hurt
No one could agree
to why, and what degree
The cueball would eventually divert.
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And finally, a tribute to our recent flurry of flames from what's-his-name:
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Subject: Joint Dynamics: (was Huebler Cues)
From: Bob Jewett
Date: 1998/01/28
Ghosst (ghosst@ican.net) wrote:
... Let's not turn me into Hitler for expressing my view ...
Bob Jewett replied:
It's generally agreed throughout all Usenet newsgroups that whenever Hitler is invoked, a thread is officially dead.
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See you next month.
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The "Best of RSB" Committee
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